Hairy Situations

After many months I finally broke down and got a hair cut. Not that I am opposed to haircuts it's just that when I do get one I end up looking like a ten year old boy for a few weeks because they cut my hair so short.
I tend to go to the cheap-o chop shops mostly because I am pretty indifferent to my hair. The trade off is that I get my hair cut quickly, cheaply, and it usually looks good but I am subjected to the wackiest hair cutters. I usually strike up a conversation with them while they cut away and the stories they tell me are so funny! One lady told me about all her children and I commented on something mundane like how were they doing in school and she replied that she didn't know because they had all been taken away and put in child protection services. Yikes!
Another time I had this very very odd lady who was to only give me a haircut but ended up giving me a haircut, shampoo, massage, and facial! I was too scared to tell her "stop touching my face!"
Yesterday's girl was equally funny. She referred to herself as an "open-mouthed" hair cutter. She leaves her mouth open while she cuts hair. One day she had lip gloss on and this guys hair she was cutting ended up all over her lips from the lip gloss....ewww!
Then another time when she was back in cosmetology school she was giving a pedicure to some older lady. I guess a toenail was clipped and landed right into her mouth. Ugh, if I EVER bad mouth my job, slap me around a bit. For all of the maddening troubles that go on at the library fortunately I never have had toenails launched at me.